JLU One in a Million
by CampionSayn
Summary: A collection of random pairings from the animated episodes in one-shot, drabble, or sentence series form.
1. Star SapphireXCopperhead

Title: JLU One in a Million.  
Disclaimer: I don't own Justice League in any way, shape or form.  
Summary: A collection of random pairings that come from the JL/JLU episodes in one-shot, drabble or sentence form.  
Warnings: There will be the oddest pairings ever, het, slash and fem-slash alike, innuendo, mentions of smex, possible gore, etc.

I have no real reason for why I am writing these random pairings, but I feel that they need to be brought up before I explode. If you have a pairing that you like that hasn't been featured, please give it to me and I will do my best to bring it to life. _PLEASE!_

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**First: Star Sapphire/Copperhead.**

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**Going to Listen: Spoilers for Fury part 1-2**

It was not surprising, but not very nice when the thing that woke Copperhead up was a hard slap to the cheek by a nicely manicured hand covered in a smooth silk glove. After the hours spent on the freezing cold concrete while writhing in pain, the venomous man was not in the mood for a fight.

He hissed and rolled onto his other side, the one that wasn't soaked in his own sweat, to glare up at who had hit him. He gave a little gasp that went unnoticed by the long legged beauty looking condescendingly down at him with an empty vile in the hand that had not slapped him. The vile was empty and only when that thought hit him did he notice that he was covered in a fine mist of powder that did not smell so nice to his sensitive nose.

"…Sapphire?" He asked curiously, throat still sore with the rest of his form.

"Yes it's me, you silly twit," she snarled, whapping him over the head. Which he absently noticed was missing his costume's hood, the thing lying behind him this incident a few hours earlier.

Copperhead's tail twitched agitatedly, but he didn't strike back at her. His head tilted left and right and he finally noticed that everyone else was gone, even that blond Amazon bitch-

"What happened?"

The last thing he remembered after Aresia had thrown that gas at them was hitting the floor, choking and noticing that the women had left him and the other two men to writhe in pain. Aresia had been smiling and dragged Star Sapphire and Tsukori out the door with whatever was still simmering in her brew. The snake man hadn't liked the look on any of their faces, even less so on the Amazon.

Sapphire lifted into the air and floated over to one of the now completely bare tables, a slightly annoyed look on her unblemished facial features. She gave a little sigh and spoke clearly, fiddling with the empty vile, "Aresia apparently had this plan when she got us all together. She was planning to kill all the men in the world with an allergen made from the things we'd stolen. You three and Superman were the first to experience the allergen. The woman was crazy."

Something in the back of Copperhead's brain was pointing out that the lovely British woman was using the past tense and he said as much, "Was? What happened?"

"She got blown up trying to launch the stuff into the upper atmosphere with a stolen jet. Wonder Woman and Hawkgirl had jammed the opening panels and only Tsukori got out with the jetpack. The Amazon could have gotten out, but she tried to keep the plane airborne. Like I said: crazy."

Copperhead processed these words much slower than he would if his head weren't so fogged up. But, when the words were fully processed, he stood up, all the bones in his knees and other joints creaking like an old man, and took a seat on the opposite end of the table Sapphire was on. It was all so mind blowing that he couldn't think of anything else to say for a little while. They just sat in a semi-awkward silence for a few minutes.

"Why'd you come back here? No men sounds like a pretty good deal for a girl like you."

A nicely manicured finger strung a lock of hair into a curl before Sapphire answered, almost shyly, "It would be, and I would have let her, but then… Well, I thought it over and it just didn't, um, seem right. I don't like men very much either, but she was taking it way too far. If a girl doesn't like men, she should become a nun or a lesbian, not commit mass genocide. Men are good for some things."

"Why save Grundy, Shade and me? I know for a fact you don't like us at all and—hey, wait a second, how'd you even get the anti-toxin?"

That same cheeky, high-class smirk he'd seen her wear so well lit up her face at the question and she held up the vile like a trophy, "Snagged it when the Lantern was in one of the hospitals tending to the other helpless men. One vile was more than enough, even with Grundy's mass."

A similar smirk lit up the snake man's face and he made a daring move, carefully easing his tail to lay on her other hand. It wasn't really that bold a move of any kind, but it kept her anchored to the subject at hand and not how she had gotten something out from under the Lantern's nose. The feel of his tail snapped her out of that train of thought and she looked back over at him. There was even a light blush that decorated both of their cheeks at the eye contact before he spoke up again.

"I guess I owe you for this. If you need anything, I'll do you a favor in the future. If I can, anyway."

It happened like a flash of her power, quick and fast with no complications. She tossed the vile behind her and she did something rather out of her character. Her hand that was covered by his tail rubbed up the slender scales, right up to the base of his back and gave a squeeze causing him to give a little jump and her, a cheerful laugh. There was no malice in the action and she rose into the air, hovering upside down above his head, her eyes locked with his in a parting word.

"I know you will. But not today, Copper."


	2. FireflyXVolcana

Disclaimer: As usual, I don't own anything from the JLU series. Animated or otherwise.

And this pairing is dedicated to **Bluebamfergirl** for the pairings she suggested. I'm only using my favorite that she recommended, but I may use a couple more down the line. So, _so_ happy.

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**Firefly/Volcana****Forever:**

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Nose crinkling like a rabbit, Volcana tossed the shriveled, almost toxic looking vegetable back at Firefly, who caught it expertly in one hand and put it back into the barrel he'd taken out from under the kitchen counter for himself. He'd already chosen the best looking ones and he didn't need more so he slid the heavy barrel back into its space.

The fire angel (as the platinum haired man had started calling her since their escape) took back her seat at the island and observed him cut up the beets. She still had a frown on her face, but he had gotten used to that and it didn't bother him while he cut up part of his dinner, still waiting for what he'd made her in the microwave to finish.

"Where did you get the idea that those…_things_ are the secret to good health?" Volcana suddenly asked, so out of the blue that he almost sliced right through his pointer finger. The lively woman usually wasn't the first to speak to break their silences, but he'd bite. Awkward conversation was better than the stone silence in his uncomfortably cool apartment that he still had to light the fireplace within.

**Toasters:**

Click. Ding. Pop!

Volcana's eyes widened in amusement as her fellow pyromaniac jumped at least a foot and spun, flamethrower raised, towards the sudden noise.

"Toast's finished," Volcana cackled cheerily. Firefly blushed visibly now that his outfit was removed and scratched the back of his head like a little school geek in front of the popular girls as Volcana took her toast and lightly nudged him in the side with her hip. The feel of her red pajama pants only made him blush harder, but this time it wasn't in embarrassment.

**Carelessness:**

"You're lucky."

"I don't feel so lucky right now."

"Hey, at least you didn't get third degree burns."

Firefly had nothing to say at Volcana's words, but then, he really didn't need to. She was right and after that was verified, there was nothing more to say anyway.

The muscular redhead continued to dab salve against his angry, burnt flesh and despite his best efforts to appear strong, Firefly couldn't stop the flinching that came from the contact. His back was a mess because of some stupid miscalculation with his equipment, most of it covered in first and second degree burns. It was humiliating.

Calloused fingers that held dripping clothe touched on a particularly sensitive patch of skin and the man leaned all the way forward, teeth smashing into each other in the effort not to let out a scream and his arms white knuckled while gripping his knees. Now, _that_ was definitely not a second degree burn.

"Oh!" Volcana actually squeaked, her own knees coming to rest on either side of his own legs as she leaned forward on the couch, bare feet going numb on the cold floor near instantly, "I'm sorry!"

"Not your fault…" He muttered, trying not to breathe too hard.

"But—"

"It's fine. You didn't mean to."

**Eat It Up:**

Taking down Polaris was actually fairly easy when Firefly remembered something his science teacher had taught him when he wasn't so interested in fire and was more interested in landing chicks. _Magnets lose their charge if you heat them_. He wasn't sure how he remembered, but considering the blue wearing jackass actually had the unmitigated gall to hit his fire angel, the pyromaniac was glad the information had crawled out from some secret area of his mind.

Giving the older man a swift kick to the area that most men had an unspoken agreement to leave alone during a fight, honorable or no, Firefly walked back over to his redhead and held out a hand to lift her up from her seated position on the ground floor of the now very deserted prison. She had the most beautiful smile on her face as she accepted the hand and got off the ground, the small sting from the hit to her cheek now forgotten in favor of admiring her significant other.


	3. Lord BatmanXHarley Quinn

Disclaimer: I don't own JLU, in the animated verse or otherwise.

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Justice Lord Batman/Harley Quinn

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**Some Hope: Takes place one day after the events in A Better World part 2**

Alfred, not having been in this great mansion in over a year since he'd decided he could not support Bruce in his and his friend's decision, was not so surprised by the sight he greeted upon the petite blond before him opening the door with a key doubtlessly given to her by Bruce. Dust had accumulated everywhere, even on the banister to the stairs that had not been touched in days. Some books and other such things littered the tables through the house and the trash in the kitchen, while actually low, was at least a few weeks old and was starting to attract houseflies.

"Oh, Master Bruce," Alfred sighed, unconsciously rolling up his sleeves to start cleaning.

A small hand on his shoulder brought his attention to the young woman. Miss Quinzelle. It was still hard for him not to flinch at her silver blue eyes despite her lacking her old form and her wearing a simple blue and white business woman's dress.

"You don't need to start on that yet," Harley spoke softly, a small smile on her face, "We have to go downstairs first."

Alright, that didn't sound Kosher to the aged British man. He knew for a fact that Bruce would never give the location of the Batcave up to this woman, reformed or no, and she was speaking at a decibel often used by secret agents and people who are hiding something. A sudden knot jerked in his stomach and he realized that the reason she picked him up out of the blue from his apartment probably had an ulterior motive.

"Downstairs, Miss?" Alfred asked in the way he had been trained to in the service, back automatically going straight and rigid, "We don't have a downstairs other than the wine cellar."

In that moment, her smile stretched from ear to ear and she looked like the spitting image of her other self, just lacking the essential white, red and black. It made hairs on the back of his neck stand high.

Before he even had the thought or the notion to move or cry out, she walked in her short, prim little high-heeled shoes over to the grandfather clock and his entire body, mind and soul knew that Bruce had not had her in his service. He finally remembered that she, this tiny little blond woman with a long history of abuse, was the _only_ Gotham Rogue to get away from Batman and the other Justice Lords. Bruce had been looking for her every since this whole…ordeal started.

And she knew anyway.

She opened the entrance to the Batcave with ease and stepped into the dimly lit darkness with quiet dignity. Alfred, finally registering just what was happening, followed after her, bending a little to keep his head from hitting the rim of the entrance and almost bumped into her. She looked back at him serenely and, upon instinct, both looked into the cave's heart, the place only lit by the giant computer that had been set on pause for what must have been a while, and the light settling on the Dark Knight.

Batman had not looked up at the sound of their feet echoing in his hideaway; he just kept his head over his folded hands and stared into nothingness. There was a gun sitting on its cold, lethal metal side beside his right arm and Alfred had a flash, a vision in his mind of just how easy it would be, from that position, for Bruce to pick it up and simply end everything…

"Hey B-man," Harley's moll echoed over everything as she started walking down the stairs and seemed to actually wake—jolt—Bruce out of whatever he had been thinking in his own darkness and spin in his chair. The white lenses of his eyes widened so comically that, had Alfred been a civilian, he would have laughed. Jovially. But he is no civilian and he is wise enough to stay in his place at the top of the stairs and let whatever would be happen.

Harley finally stopped just three feet shy of the Dark Knight and stood tall, arms crossed and gave Batman her famous, or rather, infamous, smile and let her head tilt like a curious dog in front of its master. She wanted him to say something first. Though, that would be difficult with his mouth flopping like a drying flounder.

The first thing Batman said was perhaps not one of the best or even most clever things in the world, but it was a start. Kind of like a lawnmower when one first turns the key to start it and small bits of leftover grass fly out to clear the funnel.

"…You…you're wearing normal clothes…"

Unafraid and unflinchingly, the blond woman tilted forward and with no warning and no cause she slapped Batman across the cheek with her tiny little hand with great force. Alfred gasped and took one step forward on the staircase, no more or less. Harley continued to smile and leaned backwards so she was straight again. Batman remained with his head at a slight tilt, the sting not bothering him as much as the awakeness that washed over him like the tide by the action.

His gloved hand removed itself from the arm of his chair and rubbed his jaw, just a little stubble poking out as he hadn't shaved since the day before. When he moved his eyes to meet hers, he felt something in him that, though barely there and faded like words of chalk and a board that a teacher brushes away, stirred and made some of his blacker thoughts dissipate into nothingness in light of those bright, gleaming, _hopeful_ blue eyes.

One of her legs bent and she supported herself on the other as she spoke again, this time knowing he was actually paying attention.

"I heard over your radio and some of the bugs I set up in here that you helped those copies of all of you escape and end this thing you guys have been doing. The others are gone?"

"Yes."

"And you put everything back into order? Even letting those others who defied you leave those nice, cozy prisons you put them in?"

"Yes."

"You called Gordon and apologized and…" she eyed the gun, almost like it was a nasty, tropical spider creeping towards the man in front of her and then looked back at him. Her eyes held much disappointment and he suddenly seemed smaller, more human. It reminded her of when she was a therapist and counseled victims of violent crime who kept saying the event was their fault.

She didn't like that at all. So she slapped him again, with the other hand. Then she picked up the gun and, without so much as looking or turning away from him, tossed it into the one part of the Batcave without stairs or a way to maneuver. It was the dark, never ending hole that the live, flittering bats came to and from every day and night and none of them would know when the weapon hit the bottom.

Batman gawked openly at the apparently much braver woman and didn't say anything more as Harley looked back up at Alfred and asked, politely as her suddenly less than composed voice would allow, "Me and Brucie have to chat, Al. Could you please get some coffee and tea before the kids get here? I want him to be a li-ttle more awake than this, if you please."

The white haired man, on instinct through years of service, composed himself into standing straight, and finding no reason not to leave her alone with the only living Wayne (if she wanted him dead, he thought, she could have done it by now) gave a half bow at the waist.

"Yes, of course."

As he left, Bruce blinked stupidly at where the gun had gone and then turned back to the small blond woman. His mind took a moment to catch up with what had been said, and he seemed to have a small panic attack at the words.

"You knew who I was and all you've done is call my kids?"

"No duh, B-Man," Harley scoffed. She kept speaking, but backed up a few steps as he finally rose from his chair, the seat creaking after having weight on it for such a long period of time, "I may not be happy with how things turned out, but I wanted to check up on you. Glad I did it today too, before you did something stupid like, oh I don't know, kill yourself!"

Here, she walked straight up to him and poked him repeatedly in his chest, hard as rock from Kevlar, and stood on her tip-toes to get her point across.

He, on the other hand, gave her the batglare at her actions and gave a deep growl in his throat as he talked back, just short of yelling, "You of all people have to understand that even if I get everything back in order, I cannot make up for what we did to everyone on the planet. When they know who I am—and people will starting looking so they can kill me themselves—the few people I hold dear will be put in danger. But you bring Alfred here to stop me, why?"

Batman had removed his cowl at the end of his question, not caring if this woman who obviously knew him anyway saw him look the worst he'd ever looked, even two years ago with cuts and bullet wounds. Eyes red from silent crying alone in the dark, face pale from grief and just the general look of someone who broke from the inside out. She was not afraid, but her harshness lessened and, gently, tenderly, she spoke again and even more tenderly, put her hand against his struck cheek, fitting perfectly in the red lines and warming them as her other hand settled on his shoulder.

"Flash is gone, but you're still here. You… you made a series of mistakes with good intentions, true, but you fixed it. You saved a whole other world by doing the only right thing in sending the others back and I…I know you might not understand, but speaking as an ex-Rogue, I'd rather you stayed than left. It seems hard, and you will feel horrible for a while, but life's so much better than giving up. I want you to stay….You're worth it."

"I'm not…" he started, but was silenced quickly but her taking both of her arms and sliding them between his. Her hands intertwined at the small of his back and she pressed her forehead to his chest and she squeezed with all her might against his muscles and Kevlar and spandex and everything else in a quiet, honest desperation. She wanted him to get it. She wanted him to get it and stick with it and stay with her so she knew he wouldn't fade away after everything they'd both gone through just to be standing in that place.

Bruce didn't know what he was doing, but through some sort of mechanism that was the right of every human being, he understood and responded and realized what was really going on and what had happened through the last two years. She was the only one to get away and, despite his claims to the contrary, she was the only one he hadn't really been looking for. At the time he didn't know why and justified it as an acceptable loss since Superman had already lobotomized Joker and she wasn't any real threat without him, but now he got it. He had this memory of seeing what happened to all of his Rogues once Kent had finished with them and, his arms finally responding and wrapping around Harley like the branches of oak trees around her cocoon tiny body, he remembered thinking that he'd rather let her go than lose her to them.

His cape slipped over his shoulders and shrouded both of them and he rested his head atop hers as she tightened her hold on him even more. Bruce felt…warm. For the first real time in two years, and he found himself still holding her with one arm and rubbing the area between her shoulders, actually feeling her heart pounding through her flesh and bone like a gong in a paper shack.

Harley spoke again, against his chest, shivering for some reason now and he heard the beginning of shakes in her voice, "You are the best person I have ever met in my entire life. Promise me you won't kill yourself. You have a family that loves you. Don't throw it all away…please, please, _please_…"

Bruce, suddenly cleared in the head, cobwebs wiped away with the help of the most unlikely person, felt himself begin to shake and the sting in the back of his eyes and just felt right holding her closer to him so she wouldn't cry for him.

His blues eyes closed and he tilted her head to rest his forehead against hers, "If that's what you really want."

"It is."

"Alright, I'll stay."


	4. OrionXForager

Disclaimer: Still don't own any of these characters. Might want to, but don't.

These are drabbles set to a pairing that just popped out at me after watching _**Twilight**_ part 1 and 2. There's nothing explicitly romantic, so this could really just be portrayed as friendship, but that's up to you. I just kind of found a groove and went with it, so these may be a little freaky.

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**Orion/Forager**

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**15% Concentrated Power of Will:**

Orion tensed, if possible, even more as gentle, calloused hands lathed balm over the skin of his spine. It was still horribly sensitive to any kind of touch after Darseid's massive strength nearly snapping the redhead in half and the New God was none too happy that anyone had to touch it at all; but High Father had insisted that he take the treatment. He was on thin ice after disobeying orders earlier and Orion had agreed.

He just hadn't expected to be looked after by a Bug.

**Run Devil Run- Girls' Generation:**

Blue eyes, uncovered by his mask during most of the day, blinked uncertainly as Forager sunk a little further into his mud hole at the acknowledgement of Orion's massive figure trying to get in through the opening to the cave. Without his shirt.

"Sir," Forager asked meekly, feet lapping at the mud around him as he floated backwards, further away from the New God, "What may I help you with?"

"Nothing," Orion snapped, finally wedging into the cave head first and settling at the edge of the mud, disapproval written into every pore of his frame. He didn't try to do anything, other than place his feet into the warm mud and continue to look—glare, Forager just knew, even with the winged helmet on—at the black haired, blue eyed man.

It was plainly obvious to someone with half a brain that Orion did not want to be in Forager's private sanctuary. Did not want to be around any Bug in such a filthy little place, for that matter. But he had come for a reason, so Forager would wait for him to actually say something.

Silence reigned on for hours—the actual kind—and when Forager finally put his clothes back on, grabbed his weapons and put back on his face covering, Orion still didn't say anything and left with a gruff nod directed at the skittish, overly modest Bug.

When Forager thought about it later, days later and alone, a blush settled over his face at the realization that Orion was trying to be nice to him.

**Little Bit of Loneliness:**

"Have you always been like this?"

Almost biting his tongue to keep in the surprised squeal that often sounded when Forager was snuck up on, the Bug swallowed his tea with the seven cubes of sugar settled at the bottom that was in his mouth and turned to Orion. The New God was without his helmet for once and was just looking at Forager in curiosity. His feral red eyes seemed dull today and Forager turned on the stump he had been using for both a table and a chair so he was facing the colossal man.

His own head tilted at the question given to him, "Been like what?"

"Content in your aloneness," Orion answered simply. He took another few steps and just squatted before the smaller man. If this were a normal conversation, Orion would have taken a seat beside Forager that would border on taking up the entire space; and since the redhead was doing no such thing, Forager's face became ruffled in worry, hand unconsciously setting his cup next to his small sandwich and pile of sugar.

"Why do you ask?" the Bug inquired seriously.

"Humor me with an answer and I'll tell you," Orion answered back. He was tense, which was not unusual around every other person, but around Forager was a serious red flag.

Forager scratched the back of his neck for a second before an answer worth saying came to him and he grew a small smile in his explanation.

"I'm…not exactly content…but then, I'm not entirely alone, either. I have you, after all."

"Don't try to flatter me, Bug."

"Just being honest," Forager muttered. Orion fixed him with another glare, but relented after a moment, the rise of his shoulders turning into a slouch and his red eyes blinking up through the trees surrounding them.

"I just wanted to know if you were a liar like I am," the redhead finally said. He moved his arms behind his head and fell back onto the grass. The look on the Bu-…Forager's face, filled with confusion that made him look like a puppy, made Orion give a short bark of laughter not unpleasant to the ears.


	5. MercyXLex

Disclaimer: I don't own any characters from Justice League. I make no money from this work of fiction.

Okay, so this is a one-shot, because this pairing is tangible and present and nobody is doing anything about it! It needs tending to and I would feel ashamed if I didn't give it more attention than five-hundred words.

Takes place, eh, let's go with two or so days after the events of Tabula Rasa.

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**Mercy/Lex Luthor**

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**Pity or Insurance?-:-**

The briefcase handle in her left hand was starting to make her hand sweat and itch.

Mercy switched hands and the left hand went up to the base of her neck and rubbed the bruises that had gotten remarkably dark so quickly. But, then, that was why she was wearing a black turtleneck and brown peacoat. Anyone who bothered to look passed her hair at her skin would think that the lights were playing tricks.

She wasn't even sure, exactly, why she was coming to Lex's aid; in prison again, no less. He had done this fine job on her neck and disregarded her earlier concern in his usual manner after making a mess of his situation. Again. But, then, that was why she had hung up on him, on his One Phone Call. It felt good at the time, but that morning she still had called up those oh-so-important doctors—one from Europe and one from America—and sent them to see the bald, dumbest smart person she had ever had the misfortune of knowing.

She would call up a few lawyers after this visit. But only after they had a little chat.

The warden who was escorting her led her to the very end cell and left her standing in front of the prison so reminiscent of Silence of the Lambs, with a glass door to let anyone visit see the prisoner while being protected from them trying to grab through bars and a clean, tidy little place that Lex always seemed to get when taken to prison. Thank God he wasn't standing in the center of the cell looking like a predatory animal or this whole situation would have freaked her out instead of just annoying her.

The bald man was sitting on his bed, reading a book from the prison library and either hadn't noticed her arrival or was ignoring her. She banked on the latter.

Not wanting to waste more time than she had to, she took her prim little heel and kicked the glass three times in rapid succession. Scuff marks were left, but she didn't give a damn. All that mattered was that she got his attention.

His head jolted up and he almost dropped the book at the noise. The bottom of her heels were covered in metal (made especially for her once she took over management) and it was a really horrible noise to hear if you weren't prepared for it. His shoulders hunched up and he was about to chew out who he thought would be the guard.

She was pleased to see his eyes contract at the sight of her, mouth dropping open just a fraction.

"Hello, Lex. Enjoying your stay?" She asked rhetorically, setting her briefcase beside her and crossing her arms. If she was going to talk to him, she was going to enjoy the chance to taunt him in captivity.

Lex snapped his jaw so quickly Mercy heard them make an unpleasant clicking noise and he set the book across from him onto the small table each prisoner was allowed. He looked at least a little confused (a pleasing aspect in and of itself) and it took him a second to say anything to her that didn't sound like he cared why she came. He had theories on why the hell she would come to see him, but he liked a confirmation.

"You came to say 'I told you so', yes?"

"I'm not that petty," Mercy snorted, "Looking at you in this tiny little cell without any electronics is good enough of a reason to come all the way into this dive. Hanging up on you was good, but nothing beats this. I only wish they'd let me bring my camera in with me."

The genius frowned and crossed his arms. She'd hit a nerve with the mention of his one phone call. That was a real bonus; to get a reaction out of him.

"Oh Lex, if only you could see how pathetic you look right now. I mean, you were pathetic enough when that android ripped your armor apart and Blue Boy dragged you to jail half-naked, but this is—"

"I get it," Lex snarled, a vein in his neck throbbing with the shout, "You didn't come all the way here to point out my shortcomings, so what is it? I'm not above calling the guard to remove you!"

"How was that appointment this morning? I paid the European doctor to give you a Happy Ending and just wanted to know if he came through. The blond guy offered, but I didn't want to insult you too badly. They both were handsome enough for your taste in men, but I'm pretty sure you're both a Top and that would defeat the purpose of the Happy Ending. So was the European good?"

The look on Lex's face was even better than when she came in. He looked somewhere between having a stroke, absolute horror and understanding the important part of her enquiry. His brain was just trying to block out the descriptive images she was trying to implant in his head first.

"You sent the doctors. Why?"

She shrugged, blond hair falling loosely behind her shoulders and inadvertently giving Luthor a slight view of her bruises. Most people, as she'd made it a point to think that morning, would think that the lights were playing tricks on their eyes because of the color of her clothes reflecting the light, but, Lex wasn't most people. Turtleneck plus dark jacket plus hair let down in anything but a bun in the ensample all equaled bruises turning purple.

Damn.

"I don't like you, Lex. But despite what the whole of the planet is convinced, you do have some good points."

She spoke truthfully and he was having a hard time thinking about how to respond.

"You mean other than my stunning intellect and social skills?"

She snorted, and gave him a half-kind smile, bending down and taking her briefcase back into her hand. She opened it and took something out. It was a small strip of paper with seven digits written on it in dainty handwriting.

"Yes, other than those," she replied. The strip of paper slid easily through one of the holes in the glass that served to circulate the oxygen through the room, and it flittered to the ground, landing between his feet and sitting there for him to pick up. If he wanted to pick it up.

His dark eyes blinked at her lovely (where the hell did that come from, that he should think anything about her was _lovely_?) blue eyes as she gave him another small smile and spoke again.

"That's the number for my cell phone. Call me after you see your lawyers. They're coming in an hour or so. Bye Lex."

When she lifted her briefcase into her hand and started walking back down the hall, passed Parasite, Copperhead, Toyman and a few others, a strange, foreign feeling crawled into him from out of nowhere. Almost like his Kryptonite cancer or even the flu. Except, this left him a little numb and his voice suddenly shouted something his brain didn't have time to process its usual three times. His body wanted her to hear it before she was took too many steps and the only people who could hear him were other criminals. _Desperation does funny things_, he thought absently as the words left his mouth.

"I'm sorry, Mercy."


	6. Green LanternXDee Dee

Disclaimer: I make no money from writing this. The characters aren't mine. I make no—wait, I already said that part…

Okay…I think I was in some kind of psychotic break while writing these. I just read _'Green Lantern: The Origin' _and watched _JLU: 1 and 2_ and _Batman TAS_ on the same night and then…whatever this is slammed into me like a train. Don't ask me where this came from because I don't even know.

Short explanation is that the pairing is set in the after affects of _The Once and Future Thing_ **part 2**, in a situation where that world became a sort of alternate universe and split off from the fixed reality that GL and Bats landed back in. I suppose you could think of it as AU, but not really. This is my mind working off of nothing but the desire to cross Gotham and the Green Lantern universes, really.

In short: A freakish pairing that is going way outside the norm.

Don't worry, I'll go back to suggestions for a while after this.

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**Green Lantern/Hal Jordan & Dee Dee/Deidre Denis: **_**Nothing's Ever What It Seems.**_

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The first thing that came to her mind was that she was glad Warhawk had already flown off with the Bat. That metabolic stasis caused by the stunner in her whip would be wearing off soon and he should wake up before they got back to…wherever their hideout was, she supposed. They wouldn't need to bury another of their own, which made her feel a little less lousy after she and her friends had lost most of their own abilities. Well, at least she was pretty sure that the others had lost their abilities; she had lost the hyper energetic feeling that came with being able to split into duplicates and felt more like her old self.

Dee Dee, alone and hiding in the more or less solidified structure of the arena they had battled in just an hour ago, sat on the ground, back to a wall and pinched each of her fingers until she felt them start to sting. For the last year she and her sister and—she assumed—their friends had felt numb after undergoing the crap Chronos put them through for their 'upgrades'. The sting was a welcome sign. That, and losing the whip three seconds after the original Batman and Green Lantern went after that wretched bastard.

She didn't know where the others had gone and, quite honestly, she didn't really care for the moment. Her sister—the murderer of Warhawk's father and mother and the one that had gotten Chronos to 'adopt' them—had run off with Bonk when her own whip disappeared and Static reformed from the cracks in the ground looking pissed off. Ghoul and Woof were no doubt already getting out of the city. They were the smart ones; they knew this town was dead to them now.

Having had enough of the pinching game, Dee Dee—Deidre—gave a little sigh and, almost as an after-thought, removed her wig. Her long, wispy blond hair spilled forth from its confines and settled over her shoulders, back and the ground. Had anyone passed by, they would have thought her quite fetching.

Mind still a little unclear on what she should do next, she almost didn't notice a shadow suddenly pass over her and a presence make itself known as it walked in from the entrance she was sitting by.

When she did, the usual feeling of fight-or-flight didn't kick in, but rather a feeling of annoyance. It would either be Static coming back from chasing her sister and Bonk to look for his little friends or it would be someone she didn't know coming to see what all the noise had been for the last hour. She just hoped it wasn't a cop; she wanted to enjoy this…whatever this was. Freedom would be too much to ask for, but it was the closest thing that came to describing being rid of that psychotic time traveler.

"Miss?"

Blinking up from her position on the ground, Deidre found herself looking at a very tall brunette man with a power ring….

It was a Green Lantern, but not the one her sister had…done in. He was a little younger than that one, lacking the grey hair around his mouth and chin and the very handsome complexion for a man his age. That and the other Lantern was African American. This one was white.

A sudden jolt of disappointment rushed through her at the sight. A little part of her had hoped that since Static came back from beyond the veil, that maybe, just maybe, the people that the Jokerz had wronged or worse would come back as well. She would have been glad to see the other Lantern and the Thanagarian even if it meant they were just there to arrest her. It would have taken away some of the guilt that came with working for Chronos.

The Lantern, Hal Jordan, took a tentative step toward the young woman and paused just a couple feet before her, bending to one knee to see if she was injured or just hadn't heard him.

"Miss?" He asked tentatively once more, hand just resting atop her shoulder. She didn't look injured, but he knew better than to take anything at face value. There was always the chance for internal injuries or head trauma. If she would look up and establish eye contact he would know whether she had a concussion.

She sighed at his touch and pointed right, towards the north side of the building with a tiny, nervous smile as she finally looked at him, "If you're looking for the JLU, Static left that way. He should be able to help you with whatever you need."

It took the Green Lantern a second to realize that this was one of the Jokerz he was brought up to speed on when he had been…moved, transported, re-assigned…back to Earth. He hadn't seen her earlier, but had been expecting to be attacked by her or her sister at any moment during his brief minutes with the JLU. Her teammates were bad enough to hear about, but one of these twins had been the one to kill John Stewart and his wife and he had been ready to engage in a battle for his life should he be confronted by her or her friends or both…

And here this one was giving him directions.

While she was still looking at him, he noted that her pupils weren't out of focus. One wasn't bigger than the other or streaked with red veins and she didn't seem to sway like someone suffering from dizziness would. He also noted that she didn't have her whip and her wig was hanging from her other hand. It was interesting enough for him to stay in his current position and give her a hard stare before speaking again.

"Are…Are you the Joker that killed the Green Lantern John Stewart?"

Her smile, already too small to really notice, vanished at his words and for a second he feared that they would get in a fight. But, then she drew her shoulders up and sighed, "No. That was my sister."

She wasn't lying. He didn't know how he knew, but it came with being a Lantern. She looked a little too pathetic at the moment to be lying. To him, she looked more resigned to him thinking she was lying. Like a beaten dog that didn't do anything wrong, but gets kicked anyway and just stands and takes it.

Hal wasn't sure what to say, but after a few seconds, words just popped out of his mouth and like everything else in his life, he just hit the ground rolling and ran with it.

"What are you doing out here all by yourself?"

"Nothing," she shrugged, her streaming blond hair slithering even more over her shoulders, "What's Green Lantern doing here when I'm pretty sure your bosses marked Gotham as a quarantine zone a year ago?"

"A time shift brought me here. I'm stuck here until I get some information from Oa or the League. But, even then, I doubt I'll get back. The Guardians aren't too big on time travel."

He said the words so lightly that the whole situation seemed to come into place before her and with no warning at all, a snort made it through her. Followed quickly by real laughter.

Hal drew back a little as the teenager in front of him leaned over her knees, clutching her stomach and laughing whole-heartedly. It sounded real, but painful. He saw little tears forming at the corners of her eyes and somehow knew that he had said either the wrong thing or hit the nail directly on the head and had sent her into…a manic episode or something.

After a few more seconds, breathing hard, Deidre looked back up at the Lantern, smiling ruefully, "Yeah? And who can blame them after this mess?"

"Er…Well, I…"

He didn't know what to say. Was there really any right thing to say in a situation such as this?

A few moments ticked by and, after wiping her eyes and taking a deep breath, Deidre stood up, leaving her wig on the ground without much of a care and looked down with that same sad smile she had been wearing for a little over two hours. A decision had been reach in crystal clear clarity before her and whether it led to her being somewhat useful or getting the crap knocked out of her later, she would live with the repercussions.

For now, she would do what she felt was the best thing to do.

"Well, are you getting up?"

Still very freaked out by this entire situation, Hal stood up from his crouched position and stood at his towering height of a little over six feet, dwarfing her height that barely reached his chest. He absently compared her to a Porcelain doll, with white paint on her face that was smeared in battle and himself to a Steadfast Tin Soldier…an awkward Tin Soldier nervous about a Porcelain doll standing in front of him in the freaky toy chest called Gotham. God, he missed Coast City right now.

"What's wrong?" He finally asked, backing up with one big step backwards. He noticed he was in her personal space standing up and, though it might not make her uncomfortable, it sure as hell made him uncomfortable. She was quite attractive once he looked her over, but she was also a minor, obviously. He didn't need that on top of his plate with everything else.

"You need to talk to the League," she answered, starting to walk outside into the night before this sudden onset of 'right decisions' wore off, "As it so happens, I may know where they are."

The Green Lantern followed after her outside. She sidestepped the fallen debris littering the stadium and he simply hovered over them. Evidence of the last couple hours marked everywhere, from claw marks caused by the splicer and Warhawk, to blood and power ring radiation here and there. It wasn't one of the worst messes he'd seen caused in battle, but since it was in what was supposed to be an international monument, it was certainly upsetting.

"How can you know where they are?" Hal asked, genuinely curious now, "I'd imagine the League would keep their new base a secret since the incident with the Watchtower."

She flinched at that remark, but kept a steady pace outside of the building, the Gotham sky black, while the neon over their heads that never went out glowed almost, though not quite as brightly as his power ring. He could tell it would soon rain, but thought nothing of it when a little drizzle started up with her next words.

"I said I _think_ I know where they are. I got suspicious a few weeks ago after passing by the old high school and found the doors locked. It's been vandalized and marked with graffiti, so the doors _shouldn't_ be locked. If the League is anywhere, it will be in that building."

"So why didn't you go in and check?"

"…I was busy looking for something else at the time."

"Why are you helping me?"

The rain was full-blown now; all lightning and heavy, sharp pounding of water on pavement and any person unlucky enough to be caught in it. He was protected by his ring's energy circling his body, but she was just in her little tank top, boots and short shorts.

Without really thinking about it, his ring created a giant umbrella and hovered above the both of them as she responded without much emotion.

"You seem like a nice guy and I'm giving up the crime thing. I only did it because my sister wanted me to do it, Chronos didn't give me much of a choice but to do it and now that neither of them will be coming back for me, I might as well give a cute Green Lantern directions."

"…Cute?" Hal perked up with a little puff in his chest.

She spared him a raised eyebrow, "For a guy who glows green."

He gave the umbrella above them a little spin, sending the water resting on it flying in all directs, "Said the clown girl."

"Hey," Deidre spoke up, raising a finger to illustrate her point, "I didn't pick these clothes, my sister did. The face paint just kind of comes with the job description. Trust me, as soon as I find an empty bathroom, the paint come off."

He chuckled a little as they crossed a completely empty intersection towards a hill overlooking the street. All cement and pavement, and atop the hill was the school, sitting hunched on the man-made rise like a reclusive gargoyle among tall skyscrapers.

Her pace seemed to slow a little as she noticed there was a little light shining around on the inside. She had been right, which was good for him, but bad for her. She couldn't double herself for a good defense and her whip was gone, so she couldn't prove that the stunner she built into it was the only reason Batman wasn't a smoking corpse in that stadium.

Hal, noticing the sudden dread in all the movements of her body, slowed behind her and then, quite suddenly, picked her up with the ring energy and placed her a few paces in front of the door to the school. The ring energy took the form of a hand and he thought that she really did look like a doll.

He stopped hovering and landed on her right side, almost supportive, despite his not knowing her.

"Before we go in," he said lightly, companionably, "I would like to ask your name. Y'know, in case they decide to fight first and ask questions later."

She gave him a little smile, this one real and sweet and fitting perfectly on her face as she placed her right hand nervously onto the bar that opened the door, "Deidre."

He returned the smile and placed his own hand onto the other door's bar handle, "Hal Jordan."

Both handles were pressed down on simultaneously and both doors opened. Neither door had been locked.

Maybe this was a good sign.


	7. Five For One

Disclaimer: Still don't own anything. Not these characters, not this series, I make no money from writing this, blah, blah, blah.

Okay, yes, I know I said that I'd try to stick to requests after the last chapter, but I can't help that nothing came from them and this stuck in my head like a bad song. Just bare with me, please. The first parts given are the pairing, the second part is the episode I based the pair off of and the third is the title.

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**Drabble Pairs in Five: You Can Torch the Author Now.**

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**Zatanna/B'wanna Beast**: This Little Piggy-:-**Fire of the Cheetah?**

There is a shock that runs through her body when she turns on the light and sees him sitting in her bedroom window, all calmness and relaxation and so sure of himself like some wild jungle cat, and she bites her tongue to keep from uttering a spell to send him flying down the five stories to the ground. She bites so hard that she draws blood and he notices.

"Hi there, cheetah lady," B'wanna Beast greets pleasantly enough, staying upon the sill, but she can tell he wants to come in. Perhaps he is respecting that she hadn't actually invited him in and doesn't want to overstep by touching her carpeted floor.

Zatanna sighed, walking over to her bed to take off her heeled shoes, trying for all the world to pretend that he wasn't there, like all the other nights he had come for no reason other than to pester her about her day or her magic act or other such trivial things. These visits are always short and strange, but she takes a small pleasure from the fact that he looks worried as she sucks her tongue, drawing out the blood. So worried that he edged along the sill to get a little closer to the bed, now looking more like some timid stray cat getting to know a person that showed it some affection.

This is why she likes him.

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**Bat Lash/Joana Hex:** The Once and Future Thing part 1-:-**Grey-:-**

"Leaving so early, Hex?"

Looking up from the saddle he is fastening to his horse, a sleek black one with an all around brown spotted muzzle that seemed to kick anyone it didn't like, the bounty hunter gave a little frown by way of greeting Bat. The man was on his own horse-a cheap little white one with too bright blue eyes that complimented the slim man so well-and canted up to his friend. Hex had been hoping that he would be gone before the others woke up, but no such luck with Bat Lash.

"What do you think Lash? We made a deal," Hex muttered back over his shoulder, the scarred side of his face turned further than it had to be in its frown, "Once we got rid of Tobias, I leave. I wasn't aware you wanted me to tell you so."

"You could still have waited for Smith and Diablo to wake up," Bat smiled, horse following after the other in a trot as he got in his saddle, off and away, "They would have wanted to say goodbye to us."

"Us?" Hex echoed, blinking as Lash's horse kept stride with his own.

"Well, at least I left a note. No need to make them worried."

"You're not coming with me," Hex growled, arm reaching out to try and smack the back of the other man's head, stopping quite suddenly as Lash turned his head and pressed his cheek into the much larger man's palm, sly and warm.

"Wouldn't care to make a bet on that, now would you?"

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**Hawkman/Vixen:** Ancient History-:- **Kiss or Cuddle?**

It is strange, Vixen often thinks, that she cannot find what she likes better about Carter. The fact that he kisses her in public, unafraid of people staring or highly opinioned looks of their teammates, or the fact that after they go through sex he actually likes to cuddle with her.

John never liked to cuddle, true. John never kissed her much in public either, though.

Maybe she just likes the fact that Carter loves her whole heartedly. He has given up on his fantasy of love for Shayera and actually loves Mari not as an ideal, but as an equal.

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**Deadshot/Colonel Flag:** Task Force X-:-**Complimentary-:-**

Their backs touch together in the rather small bunk meant really only to house one person at a time and both of them were becoming increasingly uncomfortable. Waller had sent them on a mission in southern Russia and this small motel was all the bitch had given them. Neither one would sleep on the floor, so Flag had offered a compromise.

It was pretty safe to say they both regretted agreeing to it as both slept in only their underwear—red boxers for Deadshot and tan, army style briefs for Flag—and their skin kept making contact under the thick covers that were actually long and fluffy enough to cover them both.

Oddly, Floyd was the one to break the awkward silence, back pressing a little more into the army man because of a little breath of cold air that made them both uncomfortable in their own skin, warmth killing the goosebumps before they rose up.

"That was a nice move earlier, by the way," the convict complimented, nudging Flag with his elbow in a somewhat familiar, not so rigid, way.

"Which move?"

"The one with the plate and the guard and the explosive," Floyd clarified, taking the opportunity to turn to his other side. The air that kept slipping under the covers was getting annoying. Besides, chest to back was always warmer than back to back. He didn't seem to notice how Flag blushed when he wrapped an arm about the army man's side.

"Uh…I-It was nothing…" Flag stuttered. He didn't so much mind that Deadshot was initiating the cuddling, as he was confused that the black haired man didn't wait until he was fully asleep, like he usually did when put into this position by single beds and their vindictive boss.

"Nothing? Would have made Boomer jealous; you should be proud about that."

"Why are you being nice?"

"Tired. I go a little loopy when I'm exhausted. Is it freaking you out?"

"Not at all," Flag lied, back unconsciously getting used to the abs and skin against him, his own hand finding Floyd's under the covers.

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**Devil Ray/Little Bruce Lee:** Dead Reckoning-:-**Welcome to Limbo-:-**

Deep, dark and seemingly all knowing eyes stare pleasantly up at the man trapped forever in a cracked suit he had died in, electric red lenses staring back in…not exactly contempt, but not friendliness either.

Deadman had brought Devil Ray to the temple after finding his lost ghost form, rather like he himself had been, floating around the area he had died, confused and angry. Boston had felt guilty and explained everything, and now, thanks to the old master monk, Devil Ray was staring at the little monk the villains had been confronted with first. His name, much to Devil Ray's annoyance and chagrin, was actually Lee and, despite being tossed around like the rest of the monks by the villains, spoke kindly and with respect to the ghost.

"Welcome to our temple," this greeting was flourished with a little bow at the waist, "I have been asked to be your guide. Do you have any questions before we start?"

"Am I really dead?" Devil Ray asked, pointing to where his nose would be if only his helmet wasn't his actual head now, rather like Deadman's outfit and ivory skin was his new form. The villain was taking this whole thing in his stride, but he really needed someone to just tell it to him straight, rather than side-step the whole issue.

"Yes. You are dead," Lee replied, a little bob of the head following the answer.

"But I'm stuck as a ghost, like this, right?"

"Yes."

"For how long?"

Lee blinked and, doing something rather like a normal kid his age would, shrugged his shoulders.


	8. GigantaXTala

Disclaimer: I don't own Justice League. I make absolutely no money from writing with these characters.

And I finally get enough inspiration to write for this suggested pair. Huzzah!

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GigantaXTala-:-The Great Brain Robbery-:-Emotional Cripple!

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She was so unequivocally fucked.

Holding the little white stick in her hand like it was the detonator to a bomb that would wipe out an entire civilization, Tala remained in her sitting down position inside of her closet. Not the one at the super villain headquarters in that swamp Grodd had picked out, but her own closet in her very own apartment in Central City where no other villains who mattered would bother her.

She had been sitting in the confined space, legs sprawled out before the open door and her own dresses hanging above her head. She had moved the clothes so they weren't actually touching her face or hair, leaving a sort of clear landing area for her body, but she could still inhale all the perfume that still clung to the fabric, all reminding her of fruit salads and expensive coffee that kept her up hours later than she should have been awake. This in turn reminded her of why she was in the closet in the first place and made her even more distraught than she already was.

Allowing herself a tiny surprised jolt as she heard knocking on the door, she continued to stare at the stick, ignoring the voice that finally echoed into her department as someone opened her door.

"Tala, are you in here? Lex sent me to find you, you blood sucking witch, so you'd better be…"

Tala finally looked up from the stick as a shadow, caused by the light invading from her ungodly wide bedroom windows, traced the lining of her bed and then graced her toes. Her eyes blinked a few times and she noticed that the human being before her was the redhead bimbo Grodd had used before the sorceress had come along. As if her day couldn't get any better.

"What exactly are you doing?" Giganta asked, not a little freaked out by the witch not only wearing white but also having the appearance of certain drug users. All dazed and red face and blank like a dear before it gets run over by a Mercedes.

"I'm sitting in my closet. On my day off. In my own apartment."

"Okay…Why haven't you been answering your phone, or your beeper or that weird little crystal ball you left Luthor to contact you?"

Not hesitant and not all that in sound of mind, Tala held up the white stick. It glinted in the sun that crept into her room, along with the sheen of her nails and little blue beaded bracelet and caused Giganta's eyes to widen to the size of jumbo sized eggs once she realized just what the thing was.

The expression caused a reaction in Tala that was unexpected and seemed to freak the redhead out even more: the purple haired witch started laughing, her unoccupied hand cupping her mouth to contain the noise.

Giganta was not a fan of Tala, not really, but she could probably be sympathetic just this once. She didn't know why she felt obligated to do so, but she couldn't help it.

Quietly, Giganta moved forward and gently sat herself inside of the closet, beside the shorter woman, one arm carefully situating itself on the other's shoulders and her other hand gently taking the white stick away. It was stiff, the action and the maneuver, but Tala still seemed to respond, some small tears falling from her eyes and tracking down her cheeks. Tiny rivers pale peach flesh.

The stick had a blue plus sign on it. Giganta hadn't meant to actually look at it, but she couldn't help it as she set it down on the floor and away from the other woman.

"I'm…pregnant," Tala wept, pitiful and hysterical, "And I'm not sure who the father is."

Rubbing little circles along the woman's back, Giganta just said whatever came to mind, just to keep the witch talking so she wouldn't break down completely, "Not sure? How many…partners have you been with?"

"Grodd and Lex. I don't even know how this could have happened! I used protection with both of them! I should not be having a baby when I used protection!"

"Well, what kind of protection?"

"The pill with them both, but I also used condoms with Lex."

"Then how could you…"

"Be _this_ unlucky?" Tala finished for her, giving a sort of chuckle and leaning her head on the broad (funny how a woman could even be that large and yet so feminine at once) shoulder, "I don't know. Maybe the pills I was taking were faulty, or Lex popped the condoms, or—and this is my favorite idea today—one of them did this on purpose. I don't know, but one way or another, I'm pregnant and I have no idea what to do."

At the end of this statement Tala devolved into sobbing even more, her body creating tremors along all of her muscles and bones and skin. She actually seemed to shrink into herself and Giganta did the very first thing that came into her mind. It wasn't perhaps the smartest thing, but it was better than letting her fellow villainess cry.

Gathering Tala into her arms, bridal style, Giganta turned out of the closet and made it so her back touched the shaking woman's bed. Then, with polish and ease, Giganta grew in size so she was about twice the size of a bear and just sort of cradled Tala in the crook of her arm.

"It'll be okay."

"How do you know?"

"I don't know. I'm just trying to be supportive." Giganta smiled reassuringly, pecking the witch on the lips to silence her.

It worked. Tala stopped crying enough to return the action and then settle her head into the dent just below Giganta's neck, lungs refilling with air and her legs curling under her so she was in a fetal position. It was so warm and comforting to _be_ comforted by someone when she couldn't even remember the last time anyone had even been nice to her on a lark.

Giganta's fingers ran along Tala's back and her nails weaved through purple hair and neither of them thought about what would happen when Tala came to her senses and decided what she was going to do with the baby. For the time being, they were both happy enough to be touching another person who cared about them enough to worry when they were in an awkward position.


	9. KryptoXAce

Disclaimer: I don't own Justice League or anything associated with it. I make no money writing this. Blah.

Written in a sort of spur of the moment fit of loving all canines of the world, please enjoy this chapter, as I assume it's one of a kind. Also, keep in mind that the Ace mentioned is, I suppose, the one featured in Batman Beyond, not the Batman comics. I much more prefer the image of the Good Bad Dog, not Lassie Come Home.

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Ace/Krypto -:- Black and White Humanized -:-

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"Hello, Krypto. This is Ace calling, and _you suck_."

With that lovely message saved into the databanks of the messaging machine the tall, jet black haired intern had bought the lovely, white haired farm boy, Ace pressed as hard as he could on the little red phone button on his cell, a resounding beep echoing after the line was disconnected.

Unbelievable. It was Ace's first day off from the hospital in a week; a week filled with enemas, appendectomies and perforated bleeding ulcers that had left the single billionaire exhausted all the way down to his bones…and the farm boy from Smallville hadn't answered his phone!

Brushing his loose bangs from his eyes, Ace rounded the corner from the street that allowed ambulances to park before the hospital and made a go for the poor unfortunate diner that looked rather out of place along the Hudson River and was bombarded every day with tired or adrenaline rushed doctors and nurses from his hospital. He needed coffee, and he needed it now or else he'd go through the same fiasco as last month when he passed out on the trolley and was slapped awake by the freaked out driver who thought he had died.

The little bell pinned to the doorframe, like all little bells in the district, dinged happily as he opened the door to the establishment this earned the inanimate object a glare that might send normal people running, but Ace continued down the aisle to his preferred seat near the back. The one booth with the only window left partially dark because of the white gunk they put on the glass years ago during Christmas that they had been unable to remove even with bleach. It was nice and dark in that spot and nobody bothered him.

…Accept certain white haired farm boys with ridiculously happy smiles holding two cups of coffee up toward Ace when he sat down like they were offerings to the god of Grouchiness.

"Hey'a Ace! How was surgery?"

Taking his usual seat, form looking somewhat dwarfed by his Armani black as sin trench coat, deep blue eyes stared in a rather defeated way at mildly attractive light blue eyes. And, without saying anything by way of answering Krypto's questioning of Ace's first time working on the internal organs of a patient, Ace snatched the giant, copper colored coffee cup from his only friend of merit and motioned back towards the waitress, expression warning her to get to them soon or there would be no tip.

"Why didn't you answer your phone?" Ace growled, swigging down his coffee and praying that Krypto hadn't added sugar. He was rather pleased to find, after swallowing the giant thing in four gulps, that the sweet substance was not to be found in his favorite coffee flavor of Morning Blend.

Krypto smiled bashfully and scratched the back of his neck, "Uh, well, you remember Isis?"

"The snotty brunette that wrapped your tractor around a tree?"

"Yeah, her," Krypto continued, sipping from his own cup, the ten tons of creamer he'd added bathing his upper lip to make him look like it had a mustache, "She, uh, she kinda broke it…while she was tossing me and my clothes out of her apartment…I kinda dumped her."

"About damn time," Ace smiled, pounding his hand on the table in what was meant to be a way of expressing pride in his friend, but instead made him seem a little crazy to the people two booths behind them, "But, hold on a second…You didn't dump her even after the tractor incident and setting your favorite T-shirt on fire with her little cancer sticks. What exactly did she do to make you come to your senses?"

At this enquiry, Krypto took another drink from the coffee, sighed, grabbed the creamer again, and then look anywhere but at Ace himself, "Well, she wasn't a very nice person."

"…And?"

Krypto opened his mouth to speak, but the waiter, not waitress (who was still talking to a man at the counter who may have been her boyfriend) came over. He was a young man that both the farm boy and the surgical intern knew from when they were younger and had still retained as a friend. Lou, whom had moved to Gotham from Africa when he was ten with his twin brother Bud; they were both extremely tan, with generally unkempt brunette hair, but Lou was a little shorter and didn't see that much sun, so it was pretty simple to distinguish one from the other.

"Hey boys," Lou greeted, pen and ticket ready, his demeanor too chipper for Ace's taste, but seemed to attract Krypto like a magnet, "What'll it be today?"

"Eggs, bacon and hash browns for me, Lou," Krypto grinned, his pinky unconsciously directing itself away from the handle of the coffee cup in what had come to be a sort of flirting motion around the slightly older man. He could remember Lou complimenting him on his manners when they had gone out to breakfast together once, and the motion had kind of stuck around, even if it had been accidental the first time.

"And I'll just have the ham and biscuit mix, please," Ace added on, glaring across the table at his idiotic friend. This continued well until Lou disappeared into the back, and then Ace leaned across the table and flicked Krypto's forehead.

"Hey!" Krypto started, almost dropping his own coffee, "What was that for?"

"For not answering my question and also not having the balls to ask him out. A duck could swim in the puddle of drool you make every time he walks into the room."

"…Could not. And I did so answer your question! I broke up with Isis because she is not a nice woman!"

"How is she not a nice woman?"

"She—" Krypto started, teeth almost bared like a dog, but held himself back a little, remembering that he was talking to Ace, whom had the worst track record with women in the history of the world, "I…she…Isis might have, sorta, kinda, insulted someone else I like. And then, I kinda, sorta, had this epiphany that I shouldn't be in a relationship with someone I don't love and who makes bad remarks about the person I actually might love."

Ace tilted one of his eyebrows in the upward direction, "And who, pray tell, is this person you are finding yourself attracted to?"

Krypto went right back to looking at anyone or anything that wasn't Ace.

After this went on for five minutes, Ace sighed and sunk fully into the cushions the booth provided. They had been friends for a good long time, but if Krypto hadn't told him yet, then Ace could just wait; Ace was an intern at one of the best hospitals in the country, he had enough patience for this sort of thing, no matter how much it felt like it might be pertaining to him as well.

"Okay," Ace yawned, "Whatever. I'm going to rest my eyes for a few seconds here. Just punch me or something when the food comes; I haven't eaten in a day and might suffer horribly if something doesn't fill me up after my nap."

Krypto nodded, watching silently as Ace sunk even more into the cushions.

It was one of the few times that the farm boy could watch Ace uninterrupted and just observe how cute the man was. Compared to Krypto, Ace was thin and pale, but not unattractive. But, he was quite different from the white haired young man in personality as well.

But, still Krypto was okay with that. Maybe, some day, when Ace seemed less interested in womanizing, Krypto would grow the stones to tell the rest of his epiphany to his best friend.


	10. Lord BatmanXHarley Quinn 2

Disclaimer: I don't own Justice League Unlimited or the characters used in it. I make no money from writing this.

This is a sequel to the Lord Batman/Harley Quinn chapter, because it niggled into my head and laid this rather sizeable egg where the other left off. And out of the egg, I found a hatched plot-bunny that ended up following me around until this was written.

And yes, I know that Damian and Jason are not part of Justice League Unlimited, but I took some liberties, seeing as the Justice Lords' world is a little different from the mainline world. Plus, I really wanted to write something with Damian. The little brat needs some attention.

**

* * *

**

Lord Batman/Harley Quinn: The Sequel.

* * *

Sitting on the porch, seeming smaller somehow, thinner even, Bruce tried to resist the urge to bolt up from his seat on the hammock he had set up over three years ago, when Tim and Damian were still with him and fighting instead of off with Dick after the Lords had taken over and together like actual brothers, and do something useful. But, Alfred had insisted in that half-stern, half-caring way he'd had before they'd all gone rogue that Bruce stay outside while he cleaned the house. The entire house, all the way from the Batcave up to the attic because, really, Bruce had allowed the dust and mildew and heaven only knew what else accumulate so much that the old British actor was in his Omega level body suit (including breathing mask) and had declared war on the dust bunnies and their kind.

It was all rather humiliating, but Bruce had just nodded and was presently waiting, once and a while taking a sip from the Cola Alfred had left him in a tall glass, for his kids—all of his kids—to come out from the health hazards inside the manor, with Harley leading them out.

_Harley…_

He was still reeling from the fact that she had been spying on him, keeping an eye on all of his activities, since she had gone into hiding. Planting a number of her own speakers and microphones and cameras on everything from some of the bats in the cave to the worn out leather in his couches would not have been an easy thing to do for even one of the Justice Lords, let alone Harley (freaking) Quinn. But, then, who was he to judge? She also managed to hide from J'onn with a mini-stasis carrier on her person at all times and avoided Superman by lining her clothes with lead, which was astounding in itself.

It could certainly be said that she was about ten times smarter than he had ever estimated her to be and, somewhere deep down, he smiled at the thought. Not on the surface, but the thought was there.

He found himself thinking about what she had told him about, while he had showered after she insisted he take his Batsuit off and dragged him up to the master bedroom he rarely had used, in the time the Justice Lords had reigned. How she had gotten out of Arkham when Leland had told her Superman had lobotomized Joker (cutting one wrist, being escorted to the medical ward, breaking a window with her bare hands, jumping off the third story, climbing the barbed wire fence,) how she had discovered she had miscarried a baby she hadn't even known she was carrying (he had been saddened by this, but she told him it was alright, she hadn't wanted children with Joker when a week before he was lobotomized he had been planning to steal away Tim and do something she couldn't stand and abide by,) and how she had stayed hidden for so long (by holing out an empty subway system and converting it for her own hidey-hole).

When she had rolled up her sleeves in offering to help Alfred make lunch while Bruce showered, the haggard hero had almost gotten sick at how many scars she had all over her. Those had not been there when Joker was his old psychotic self; they had been a result of her getting away from the Justice Lords. They were the perfect make for barbed wire cuts and other such things. It left a bad taste in his mouth when his stomach fluids tried to make their way out of his throat.

His dark thoughts of loathing had almost resurfaced at these images of her running for her life every day for two years, but she had threatened to slap him again if he didn't knock it off. She didn't hate him, she didn't hate any of the Lords. What they did was wrong, but she had said that they were already paying for it, as was he with his own guilt, why make things worse?

Blinking away the thoughts, Bruce went to take another sip of his drink, the fizzing it caused burning down his throat, waking him up a bit more as even after stepping into the light, he was still a forever night person.

"B-man?"

Looking up from his drink, deep blue eyes looked towards the door to the manor at the shining silver blue eyes of Harley. The little blond had her arms crossed, not over her chest but under her breasts, looking all for the world like…Bruce didn't know…maybe a ghost or a fairy. Or even an angel, seeing as she had only just earlier kept him from killing himself alone in the dark. Even with her infamy, that seemed more appropriate.

"Your kids are in the living room," she smiled, walking down the steps to push him inside if he needed pushing, "I know you wanted to see them out here, but that just means that they'll have more room to beat you up. Inside, at least Al will have control of the situation."

Bruce nodded, swaying the hammock until his feet had a firm hold on the ground and allowed the ex-Rogue to grab his arm and lead him inside to, well, as far as he was concerned, the beating he deserved. He had resolved himself not to fight back if they wanted to have it out with him anyway.

"Oh, and B-man," Harley whispered, poking his cheek with a hint of her old mischievousness in her eyes and that little smirk she had been giving him since she had nearly seen him naked in the shower, "They hit you and you don't fight back, _I'm_ going to go at them with my mallet."

"B-But—" Bruce responded with as much grace as a complete moron, "I deserve it!"

"I don't care."

Before he could give a retort much more in the fashion of his old self, he found they were in the entrance to the living room, four sets of very different eyes glancing up at the both of them.

Jason was leaning against the grand piano, eyebrow raised more at Harley than at Bruce, smoking one of the cigarettes Bruce still frowned upon. Dick was seated on one of the expensive leather chairs that Bruce recalled Harley pulling one of her sound recorders out of, a non-too-pleasant look on his face. Tim and Damian were sitting on the same couch, each turning around as their father entered, their own features distorting a little with different opinions of the situation.

Bruce could guess why the girls weren't there, but didn't want to leap to conclusions so soon after not seeing any of his kids in so long. Four was pretty good, seeing as it was Quinn who had called them up out of the blue. The girls had probably heard three words out of Harley's mouth and then hung up. But, that was only Bruce guessing. He couldn't be sure.

Making it into the room, Harley still guiding him, him subconsciously gripping onto her hand like it was a lifeline and he was drowning in the sea, he stopped just at the fireplace. Bruce kept his eyes down, for the first time in a long time, afraid of what might happen. Dick and Damian just looked so angry at him, he could feel their eyes burning holes into his head.

"So," Jason spoke first, his deep voice assisting Bruce in lifting his head up from its bent position of submission and guilt, "You finally came to your senses."

"…Yes."

"Why?" Dick and Tim said at the same time, blinking at the echoing, but ignoring it as the result would be the same.

"I…" Bruce swallowed, and allowed Harley to release his hand and head for the kitchen to help Alfred, sensing in that way women did, that this would go better if they were left to themselves, "I had a conversation with myself, in a way, and realized that we had taken things too far. Much too far."

"Barbara called," Dick said, "She said the other Lords are in jail, with no powers. Did you have a hand in that?"

Bruce shrugged, "The jail cell part, and I did call Gordon so he could be sure that he was in charge of being their warden, and being the commissioner again. But, not their losing their powers. The League from an alternate universe did that."

"And what will happen to you?" Tim questioned, hand absently holding Damian's as Bruce noticed, perhaps for the first instance, that the youngest Robin was shaking a little and no longer looking at his father, but rather at the painting of Thomas and Martha Wayne.

"I don't know," Bruce sighed.

"I do."

Looking away from Bruce for a second (or his sons in Bruce's case, and the portrait in Damian's) all heads turned to find Alfred and Harley bringing in some lunch. Tea, coffee, sandwiches and pudding. Really, it more of an ensemble for tea-time rather than an actual lunch, but since Bruce hadn't gone shopping for…weeks, there wasn't much Alfred could work with. But, considering what there was, it worked out pretty well.

All of the men were looking directly at the woman, suspicious and quite frankly just freaked out that she was even there and waited for her to elaborate. As she and Alfred moved the food onto the table at the side of the room, prim proper and warm, she continued, smiling faintly.

"Before I picked up Al, I called Gordon, that Waller woman that worked for the President before you had her sacked, Question and two of the Arrow clan. It took a little convincing, but after I got the Arrows on board, the rest agreed that you would head the Justice League once it is re-instated and they wouldn't press for your identity as long as Waller and Gordon talk with you later this week and are allowed…how should I put this? They'll sort of be the mediums between you and the general public and political sectors from now on. You know, like parole officers so you don't go off again."

By the end of the petite blond woman's explanation, Dick was looking over at Bruce to make sure he didn't have a heart attack. The billionaire's pupils were now the size of pinpricks and his mouth was only slightly open for him to breathe. He wasn't breathing, but had rather shut down his lungs. Dick faintly thought that he could probably catch Bruce if the man collapsed and then looked back to the woman whom, in a blink, was standing in front of him offering him tea or the coffee.

Since Bruce obviously wasn't going to say something until he was out of his catatonia, Dick did it for him, for all of them, really.

"And why would you be doing this for us, Harley?"

Small shoulders shrugged as she poured the eldest Bird Boy his coffee, steam rising up and touching her face and Alfred did a similar action with the other Birds, "I've got nothing better to do."

"Awful generous," Jason noted, stirring the cream and sugar in his coffee with the tiny little spoon set on the edge of the trays of all of the boys' cups, "Considering Supes lobotomized your psycho-ass boyfriend."

"Actually," Harley nearly growled, but stifled it down as she flicked Bruce between the eyes and caused him to take the teacup of jet black coffee she was holding before him, "Everyone pretty much got what they wanted from that. He's not going to kidnap, torture, kill or rape any one of us when he's like this. Kind of worked out for everyone, didn't it?"

Jason didn't have anything to say to that.

Each of the boys, including Alfred, took a large swig from their drink as the conversation died for about three agonizingly long minutes. Harley just took a seat on the arm of the couch the youngest Birds sat on, taking sips and enjoying the taste of the ultra-expensive coffee, enjoying every drop. It seemed to Bruce that she was enjoying this.

Surprises of surprises came when Damian broke the silence.

"Have you been sleeping with father?"

Having been sipping from his cup, Bruce coughed his drink up and tried not to clench his teeth against the glass. In retrospect, he really couldn't have expected anything else from his youngest, after all, what little contact he had with women often involved fighting, sex, saving the world or (and this is by far the most disturbing thing yet) Talia, which was an odd mix of all three.

It was a small consolation to see that Dick was also choking on his drink, Jason was laughing a little and Tim was hiding a blush behind his hand.

It was not so much a consolation to see Harley just sort of looking with a deadpan expression at the littlest Robin, chewing a little at the lemon cookie Alfred had found in one of the cupboards in the kitchen. Damian didn't flinch, but Bruce noted that he wasn't looking the ex-Rogue in the eye. It was good that he realized on his own that that was the wrong thing to ask, Bruce supposed…

When Harley was sure the young man had suffered enough, she patted him on the head like a kitten, earning a low growl from Damian, swatting her hand away without much success.

"I'm going to go with no," the blond smiled, "but thanks for playing. Any other questions from the class?"

"Did Bruce tell you his identity or did you figure it out alone?" Tim voiced nibbling on his own cookie, his a cinnamon with white icing.

"That would be option B," she said, "It was a long time ago, though. Bird Boy numero uno could actually remember that day, too."

"…What?" Dick and Bruce echoed off of each other.

"Guess B-man, guess. Bird Boy was still a teen, you were on a date, you were out of costume and really nice to me."

"…"

Receiving blank looks all around, Harley sighed and set down her cup on the table. She rose from her seat and padded over to Bruce until she was just inches from leaning chest to chest, though that would be quite a feat as he was a grand scale taller than her in all areas. She gently raised her arm and brought her hand over his eyes, making only his lower face visible.

"'Don't I know you," she quoted of herself, voice playful as she felt his eyes widen under her palm, "Something about that chin…I know!"

Here she pulled away her arm and pointed her hand in an 'Ah-hah' moment, Bruce and Dick's eyes widening even more, "'You're Bruce Wayne, the boy billionaire!'"

Both of the eldest crime fighters looked completely shocked as the petite woman took her spot back on the couch. That had been an interesting show for the younger siblings, even if not one of them understood any of it.

"Why…" Bruce stopped a second, forming his words as best he could without sounding like a complete moron, "Why didn't you say anything?"

"Didn't think I had to," she shrugged, "There was nothing else to say."

"Why didn't you tell Joker?" Tim spoke from his position, honestly forming a pretty good picture in his head already, but with grey areas.

At the mention of the dark, previously quite psychopathic clown prince, the small smile that had been quite pronounced on Harley's face faded and she picked up the empty trays, "I'm going to help Alfred wash these before he heads out to go shopping."

As Harley followed the aged man into the kitchen, Bruce's blue eyes followed after her. Now that he thought about it, and now that he knew a bit more about her situation she had hinted at, the question was begging to be answered. Why hadn't she told Joker? Wouldn't that have made her life easier? Why the hell was he standing there when it was his house and he could ask her until he was blue in the face?

Setting down his still boiling hot coffee, nearly full and with the sugar he'd added wading the bottom like swamp slime, Bruce gave a little pause towards his sons, but was interrupted by them getting up with him. The sounds of their cups was like a rendition of River Dance (aside from Jason, whom brought his along) and Damian answered the un-asked question.

"Uh-uh, we want to know the answer, too."

* * *

Alfred was already putting on his coat, but gave a small pause as Bruce and the boys hovered outside of the kitchen, listening to Harley clean out the coffee pot and such inside of the sink. They could all hear the water running and the image of her delicate fingers fishing out the coffee grounds from within even the most difficult to reach part of the pot's spout came to mind. None of them looked willing to actually go in and talk to the woman, so the aged, white haired man sighed, straightening his jacket further and placing his hat upon his head.

"If I may be so bold, sir," Alfred said kindly towards Bruce, keys in his own hand jingling as he stood before moving towards the garage, "Any questions you ask her will be answered, if you'll just go and do it. What has she to hide now, after all?"

All of the Gotham Knights heard the words Alfred spoke, but didn't fully believe them, even when the front door knocked shut. It was Alfred, though, and he was generally…okay, always right, about everything.

Still, actually asking the woman personal questions would have been awkward even in his prime, so how much could Bruce really get out of her while she was cleaning his dishes?

Answer: Absolutely nothing if he didn't get in there.

Sighing, Bruce seemed to sag, but moved into the kitchen. The sight of Harley doing exactly what he thought she was with the coffee pot actually scared him more than it should have and he almost made back for the living room, had Dick not blocked the way with his arm (still hiding with the other boys behind the wall) and his hand started making a clockwise spin motion.

'_Traitors,'_ Bruce couldn't help but think, begrudgingly making back for Harley.

"…Harley?"

"Mm?" the blond hummed, not bothering to turn around.

"You didn't answer Tim's question," he started, getting right to the point of the matter, lest he spend a further eternity of Hell, "Why? Why didn't you tell Joker who I was? Or Ivy, or anyone else, for that matter?"

"…It doesn't matter anymore. Any reasons I had for doing anything are kind of mute now, don't you think?"

Bruce felt himself move forward, despite his mind having no say in the matter, and he turned her towards him. His big hands covered both of her shoulders completely as she looked up at him in a way similar to a frightened dog. As though anything she said could possibly make him angry after this whole…this…everything.

"It matters to me, Harley. Tell me why."

Still being held by him did not help to hold her resolve in not saying anything on the matter. She didn't exactly break down, but little drops of moisture formed behind her eyes, a shaking along her whole body starting up from some unknown she had been holding onto for a while now.

"…I didn't want to hurt you."

From out in the hall, all of the boys looked at each other for a moment. The words themselves were not as important as the meaning behind them and what they entailed. 'Hurt' could be taken as a very short, simple description of kill, ruin, or completely destroy everything that Bruce had worked for in his role as Gotham's protector, and even as a father. 'You' perhaps did not just mean Bruce, but all of his allies, his friends, the sons he had taken in.

Well, dang.

Bruce, with all of his lack of abilities in handling women of any kind, had no idea in the world how to respond to that. But, then, the choice he went with was not the worst thing that could have been done. When he could how answered that she really didn't, or how she was never that bad, or how he could have handled anything…

He just sort of unclenched his hands from around her shoulders and brought both arms around her. His head rested atop of hers for the second time that day and he let her tears drench his front for the second time that day.

This was trust.

Contentment.

Right.


	11. AresxDove

Disclaimer: I do not own any characters of DC Animated, nor do I make any money from this.

My writer's block had risen from mine eyes and I can work on this again, thank God.

* * *

Dove and Ares-:- During the events of Hawk and Dove-:-Strapping.

* * *

Hank was never, ever going to let him live this down. Ever.

Returning to consciousness after getting smacked around by the god of war until he hit his head on the end of the desk—the one the blonde immortal had been working at, little roaches and paint chips strewn all over it—the blue and white keeper of Order blinked his eyes open to find himself being bound.

Actually, worse than that, he was being bound to the giant metal suit of (apparently) mystical armor. He looked like the sacrifice for a sacrifice to an ancient relic in Indiana Jones and the throbbing in the back of his head was forgotten in place of mortification.

Ares was finishing up the last binding—his right foot, with his head bowed uncomfortably close to Dove's groin—and, blinking, looked up at the young man. He was smiling.

If Don wasn't such a pacifist, he would have had the urge to tell the war god to 'turn the fuck away' in a similar fashion to his big brother when they had to shower in the men's locker room in high school and the other boys attempted to sneak a peek to gain more steam in ridiculing/beating him up. But, sadly, he only managed a rather pathetic glare—narrow eyes and lower lip pouting out—but it didn't come off as much more than something for Ares to actually laugh at. Like a hyena, teeth glinting.

"Welcome back to the land of the living, Little Bird."

"What are you doing with me?"

Ares grinned even more spectacularly and—to Dove's dismay—ran one of his hands up Don't thigh, eliciting a rather undignified squeak from the young college student/pacifist superhero.

"Why, I'm using you as a hood ornament for the Annihilator. Your color is a little off for its paintjob, but once the bullets start to fly, I imagine that your colors will fit better."

Dove flinched, that all too curious hand roving much too close to his more sensitive areas than deemed comfortable. For once, though he'd hate to admit it, he wished his brother would be more brash and rush over to this side of the battlefield. It wasn't as though Don couldn't take care of himself, but usually he had use of one arm or leg, which was enough to pull off a defense maneuver. Like this and with the aged blonde not actually attacking him or—technically—hurting him, the forces of Order would not allow him the strength to pull on the ropes holding him.

So, in desperation, Don ran his mouth in his usual way, "What good with this do for you?"

"Why, it will keep you out of my hair, certainly," Ares said, moving away and towards the door, the Annihilator following after silently, causing the ropes binding Dove to rub painfully into his skin, "Though it's quite a pity that I couldn't keep you around longer. If that pesky energy of Order wasn't attached to you and giving me this massive headache, I would have kept you for more…entertaining purposes."

"Entertaining…?"

Pure of heart though he was, Don could connect one dot to another and, for an instant in the back of his head—perhaps kept in the same memories as the combination to his locker back at school, or knowing where Hank kept his condoms—he was confronted with memories of that seminar for anti-rape crimes and the visual aids that they had used to illustrate the tortures suffered by both sexes because of men like Ares.

Dove felt the urge to call out for Hawk, but his throat had grown a knot in it.

Hopefully, Ares wouldn't change his mind. Dove could handle being shot at given that (despite claims to the contrary) Hawk was always somewhere nearby and had this knack for making sure his little brother wasn't hurt, but Dove couldn't handle being made to do something like…what Ares had implied.

He was a virgin, after all.


	12. Hal JordanThaal Sinestro

Well, I've been away from this rather a long time, haven't I? Well, I come along with a gift after reading the DC Comics Encyclopedia and finding the most unusual references to pairings not in the animated version that would be fun to toy with. Also, I'm a liar. There will be pairings involving the comics as well as the movies that have come out… Sorry. But, hey, the JLU enterprise is comprised of basically all DC references, so I'm moving ahead in the game.

* * *

**Hal Jordan/Thaal Sinestro**-:-Green Lantern Emerald Knights Movie/Comics-:-**Any Attention**-:-Music Drabbles

* * *

**Green Grow the Rushes Oh**- by Celtic Wonder:

Dark sky and brightly illuminated stars stood out against the human Lantern's Earth and Sinestro looked on in awe and wonder of being able to make out constellations that Hal had often spoken of when he had spoken of his home planet (_Ursa Major being the mother bear of the cosmos, Orion in its trinity so bright Sinestro had tried to make a construct of a bracelet for an hour to match its brilliance and had failed, and that one star Hal had pointed out that sat just close enough to the moon to make them seem important to each other, the human often quoting phrases from some fantasy book when Sinestro asked about it_).

"Don't they have constellations back on Korugar?" Hal asked curiously, sipping his beer and eyeing Sinestro in the human clothes the red alien had accepted when it became apparent that they would have to stay on Earth for a recharge and finding that Thaal looked good in simple blue jeans and one of Hal's old grey button-up shirts.

"Sometimes," Thaal answered, taking a small sip of the beer offered to him and finding the taste not unpleasant, "But none so many as bright as these."

**Anyone Else But You**- Juno Soundtrack:

Kissing, Thaal had to admit, when done with a human (_tongues had never been so important as when Sinestro discovered just what they could do_) was a fantastic thing to perform. The taste was sometimes different (_Sinestro found that sometimes his partner tasted mostly of oranges or something called mint that left the end of Sinestro's tongue tingly and warm in a cold way_) but that was acceptable when Hal once and a while showed the Korugan just how far back into Sinestro's throat the human tongue could reach.

Now Sinestro understood the phrase 'tonsil hockey' that Guy Gardner often brought up around the two of them.

**Call to Arms**- Legend of the Guardians Soundtrack:

"I know that it might be hard to get back to the way things were," Hal started (_leaning into Sinestro as the other leaned against him as well; both of them quite worn out after taking on hundreds of the people who had once been comprised of that which had been Sinestro's own corps… form before_), gritting his teeth as they came to the lower level of the infirmary of Oa, "But you don't have to be such a grouch."

"I am still rather unfamiliar with this phrase 'grouch' you speak of," Thaal answered, unsympathetic as they took to more stairs and Hal had to press a little more into him as the human's cracked femur bone turned against him and they had to pause, "But I believe what you said before that has no merit to why I should be as I am. I am a traitor to the Green Lanterns as well as my… I have the right to be as irritated as I wish when I technically have nowhere to go after we're patched up."

"That green ring on your finger would be to differ." Hal grinned (_Sinestro pausing himself as his dislocated arm moved too quickly as they stepped down into an open hallway and it hit the wall_), seeming a little too cheerful, but then that could just be because of the adrenaline that Sinestro had learned made most humans a little too cheerful just a while before they started writhing in pain from injuries of battle.

**In the Sea- America**-:- The Last Unicorn Soundtrack:

"Jordan? Jordan? Are you injured?"

Still standing stock still by the little pond that was set perfectly in the center of a park Sinestro had set up inside a less than desirable district of Korugar (_it was amazing, really; a few trips to Earth with Jordan illuminated the most fascinating facts about good ventures to put stock in if it meant helping out the general population by adding on a little green in an otherwise entirely rock and steel comprised area of life_), the brunette human swerved an eye over towards the inquiring alien and motioned his head over to a large herd of small animals indigenous to the area.

"What are those called?"

Sinestro frowned from the human and over to the animals (four legged mammalians with thick, wavy coats of stardust colored hair, tails long and winding with little tufts of soft black fur at the end, ears that stood tall and not unlike an animal called a rabbit on Jordan's planet; females each had a brown horn jutting up from the middle of their foreheads, males having two black ones in a similar fashion except much bigger for combat and attacking predators), before answering almost suspiciously, "Them? Those are Naa-Ra Whae-Les. Their milk provides for both drink and the making of food."

"Say what they are again?"

"Naa-Ra Whae-Les."

"Na… Narwhales?"

"Your pronunciation in atrocious."

**Better Than Me**- Hinder:

"…_the edge of the bed, where your nightgown used to be_…"

He knew he really shouldn't be tearing through Jordan's private rooms on Oa itself, door open for anyone to see him in his trespass and likely to beat him (or try, anyway) to a pulp, but he couldn't take it anymore. His room was right next door to the human's (_never let it be said that it wasn't useful during the middle of the night when no one was around and they each had a day off at the same time to be spent in the other's private company_) and for the last two hours, while Thaal was trying to finish the report from the mission the day previous, the device Jordan had been using to awaken him when Thaal wasn't around (an alarm clock) had not stopped playing the most (_irrationally, because it was just words and therefore should not be such an obscene bother to his ears_) depressing music.

"…_That time at the mall, me and you in the dressing room_…"

" !?#" Thaal cursed in his native tongue (_actually, it was a swear not all that different from the human incitation of a phrase synonymous with excrement, but with a lot more emphasis in the end that sounded more like an 'Oh' in a guttural sense; most prominent because of Sinestro's own vocal ability_) and flipped over the mattress he and Hal often used to do things in that if the Guardians found out about there would be a long meeting about work relationships, and found the hideous contraption with human numbers and time frame workings (_shaped into the head of Marvin Martian because it was so cute_).

The green embodiment of his own will took the shape of a hammer (or, more like, a mallet) and slammed down with satisfying force onto the device as it gave out its last song lyric before being crushed into precisely seventy-nine pieces.

"…_You deserve much better than me_…"

Sinestro allowed himself smug satisfaction for about ten seconds before he realized that now he would have to probably find a substitute for the clock within the next day or Hal would withhold the ten hours of (_and Sinestro could quote, because that was what had gotten him to do the paperwork while Hal went to go and help Kilowog train the new recruits_) "mind blowing personal time" he'd planned to spend with the other for almost a month.

Thaal snorted to himself and made a construct of a duster and pan to clean up the mess of plastic and such debris before muttering to himself, "Ridiculous human garbage."


	13. Evens and Odd

This came about from discovering the new DCNation poster for October that featured an all villain ensemble and had me going 'WTF' when I saw who they had standing as opposites on screen, which were as follows—Darkseid beside Black Adam, Black Manta and Captain Cold, Joker and Lex Luthor and (this is the one that disturbs me the most), Sinestro and Harley Quinn. I can get that Darkseid and Black Adam are meant to be representatives of opposing power against goodness/virtue and childhood purity; I can get Black Manta and Captain Cold representing greed on two different homefronts; I especially get the madness of logic and disorder as portrayed by the biggest thorns that ARE Luthor and Joker. I DON'T get why they put Sinestro and Harley near each other; I get they needed a woman and I've adored Harley forever—and Sinestro, just recently—but, for heaven's sake, use another woman or someone other than Sinestro within thirteen inches of the lady clown. If you squint you can almost think she's actually looking at him and it ruined the whole portrait for me. Seriously, go and look at it over at tumblr; you'll be creeped out too.

But, on the bright side—An Up-Date! An all Alternate Universe up-date… Well, at least I'm in my element here. Also, a little present for a friend overseas; CharmedSerenity.

* * *

Darkseid/Black Adam-:-DCNation Versions-:-California AU-:-

The contractor looked younger than the official overlord to a communist party overseas thought was possible, but he also looked more than able to do the work on Darkseid's new home; what with the way that his muscles curved in his tight T-shirt and how he managed to carry around a grouping of rebar with very little slow moment when the older man new that it was well over a hundred pounds.

"How long will this take? I intend to move in as soon as possible, so an estimate would be in both of our interests," Darkseid stated, arms still behind his back in the most regal of military fashions. It made his deep purple suit look even more ridiculous in Adam's opinion, though.

Adam splayed the planning for the house out on his work table, the glorious and very uncomfortable summer sun glaring down on the blue and yellow outlines on the paper, almost making it unpleasant for his dark eyes to read them and do the estimations in his head at the same time.

"I'd estimate about thirty days. Perhaps less if the plumbing pipes come in sooner, but judging by your backyard it may be more like forty. Do you really need it to be double reinforced?"

Darkseid nodded, eyeing Adam's upper torso as he turned to look at the older man, some sweat dripping along his neckline and staining the top of his shirt.

* * *

Captain Cold/Black Manta-:-New 52 Version-:-Zoo Keeper AU-:-

David sighed as he herded yet another of the penguins from the Arctic section of the zoo out of the Sea World section that was his own. This was the third time in as many weeks that Len Snart had come to him and begged for David to help him locate some Rockhoppers and Emperor penguins that had found their ways out of their own icy waters and into the tanks that generally house octopi and other large sea life that might mistake them for a new food source.

The little Emperor penguin that he'd fished out of the octopus tank waddled through the door that Len was holding open, glaring openly and with severe contempt at the bird. It would almost be humorous to David if David had a sense of humor.

"Thanks again for this," Len started, patting David on the back. It was fine for him to do so, oddly, even if David did have severe OCD coupled with a few other mental problems that usually made him hostile towards any sort of touch.

"Not a problem. But perhaps you should find their exit point. If you don't, you might get fired the next time management comes by and the penguins get out again."

He said it in that flat way that made Len very uncomfortable, but he locked the door and nodded at the darker man understandingly, leading the way out from the tunnels that connected most of the habitats for the staff to get to, leading both of them in the way towards the workers' lounge. After David helped him, Len often treated him to a small hot meal. He didn't like how David, when he went to lunch in the far right corner of the lounge, in the exact same yellow chair every day, usually by himself and glaring at the smudge on the ceiling that was older than all of the staff, only ate saltine crackers and clam chowder. It was unhealthy and Len had recently put it into his mind to get David to eat other things—like ice cream or burgers.

* * *

Joker/Lex Luthor-:-Crisis on Two Earths-:-The Jester Lives AU-:-

It had taken a long time (over a year of collecting the data and blood samples and hair from the shower drains of former hideouts), but Lex was finally hugging the Jester against him so tight that the green haired, white skinned clown was loudly complaining that he was going to have broken ribs if the leader of the Justice League didn't let him go. But, Lex couldn't help it; he had been missing his friend since the second he saw the explosion that doubtlessly lead to an instant death, but still probably hurt for a second.

Lex finally let go of Jack and found his hand coming to his eyes to wipe away the beginning of wetness along the grooves of his cheeks, "My apologies, old friend. I just needed to be sure all of your faculties were in order."

Jack looked doubtful, not missing the movement of Lex's hands at all and taking the unoccupied hand of his fearless leader, bringing it up to his teeth so he could nibble on the grooves of knuckles tan and healthy and still sporting scratches from the week before when he'd been in a fight with Archer and Aurora. He still tasted like chalk and blueberry flavored sports drinks. After being dead for more than a year, it was good to know that some things didn't change, even after trauma. Chalk meant he still climbed rock walls at the gym and still drank as many sport drinks as possible to keep himself both hydrated and alert in case Mercy tried to get him out on a date.

"Sure you did. You could have just as easily jumped me like a pole dancer, too, you cheesy sap."

* * *

Sinestro/Harley Quinn-:-Emerald Knights Version-:-Good Guy, Good Girl AU-:-

Missionary work on other planets was hard to do, but well worth it in the long run. Or so Thaal Sinestro kept telling himself. On Earth it seemed never ending and difficult as, until just ten years before when the Lantern corps had gotten human lanterns on the force, the human race thought that they were the only sentient beings in the universe; which made some of the less understanding people quite confused and sometimes violent in the relief efforts the other Lanterns partook in whenever there were disasters that called for more attention than the four human Lanterns were able to give.

For instance, a large and devastating earthquake that had left the city of Gotham in shambles. None of the human Lanterns—Rayner especially—liked Gotham when it was vaguely structured, let alone when it was in mass chaos that meant the local crazies and such were wandering about and killing as many people as possible. So Sinestro had been told, explicitly by Hal Jordan, to be always on his guard.

In his defense, he thought as he lay in a strange bed with stomach injuries quickly bandaged and some of his uniform ripped away to allow for other injuries to be treated, he had not known about a white skinned man by the name of Joker. If he had, he might not have been so quickly knocked out by some strange gas his ring hadn't been able to completely defend him from.

He lifted himself up from the pillow he was laid out against and, with a pleasant jolt, found a blue eyed woman with very light yellow hair looking at him from her position at the end of the bed, standing with a tray of water and some little black pills he'd once seen Kyle Rayner take after being hit repeatedly by a Thanagarian she-beast that weighed upwards of five hundred pounds and hopped. His mind was slack from the attack and loss of blood so it wasn't too much of a surprise when his mind whispered, 'How very pretty.'

As it seemed, she didn't think he could speak English, so she silently nodded at him as she set the tray on his lap and waved a hand from the objects (_the pills wiggled in their spots like Borack Berries, but he ignored that thought as well_) and then placed a finger up next to his mouth.

Blinking, he got her point, but would later (_back at base, talking with Jordan about human customs that his ring couldn't provide; humans were such a young culture that information was limited to poisons and language and what was edible_) recall the scars along her wrists and just how bone thin she looked compared to Carol Ferris and some of those Justice League women.

He settled in the moment with just saying, "Thank you, miss. My name is Thaal Sinestro. Might I inquire your name?"

She jumped almost out of her skin (_some creatures did that in space, but Thaal had never seen them himself and doubted very much that it was possible for humans), _but didn't run off and smiled delicately at him, her own voice with an accent even he could pick up over his universal translator; one of the many Earth seemed to possess in every single culture, "Oh, my name is Harley. I apologize about your condition, but that's the best I could do with what I had in my medicine cabinet."

Thaal downed the pills easily (his ring chirped in his peripheral hearing that they would be perfect for the symptoms running amuck in his system) and smiled at her.

* * *

Vigilante/Shining Knight-:-JLU Version-:-What Is This-:-

Greg once paid a woman in a travelling carnival to read his palm and look over some cards to tell his fortune. If his mother had ever caught him, she would have tanned his hide and then made him go to mass every available day instead of playing guitar and roping cattle with his friends so he never told her, or his Pa, or anyone else. He went in the middle of the night and when most of the makeshift shops were being put away, so nobody ever found out.

He kept in mind what the old woman with the rum colored eyes said, even though at the time the words didn't make sense and made a point to find her grave and put flowers next to her family plot when the words came true.

"So, one moment, the men are supposed to jump in front of the president if a gun rings out in the hopes that a bullet will hit and potentially kill them instead of the president?"

Sir Justin looked utterly (and adorably) astounded as they looked upon the screen in Greg's Watchtower room, observing Clint Eastwood act out his role as a service agent for _In the Line of Fire_. His ribs were still sore and his head just barely patched up from the confrontation with the monstrous General, so he wasn't allowed to partake in any JLU missions until Batman gave the OK, and even that wouldn't happen for another week.

Greg was okay with waiting with the blonde. It gave him the better chances of getting to hold Justin's hand when it strayed over to Greg's own. The knight didn't often become afraid during a movie, but gunshots still made him flinch and shy away from his spot on the couch. Most likely, in Greg's opinion, it was like being under a cloud full of thunder back in England.

"Yep," Greg nodded, taking a small gulp from the light beer he'd pulled from the mini fridge before he'd sat down and put in the movie, some of his fingers very cold and unlikely to make Justin feel any better, so he kept his other hand still with Justin's instead of using both of his hands to hold the beer, "That's most of their job description, aside from paperwork. They also have to drag the president out of the line of any other fire the second they get the chance. Like a bunch of Old Yellers draggin' a stuffed bunny out of a chicken house."

Justin's blonde hair bounced a little as he nodded his head (_he had gotten used to Greg's odd way of putting things about the same time he realized that he wouldn't be penalized with being burnt at the stake for revealing himself to most of the Watchtower that he was attracted to men; a soaring feeling filling him up on both occasions_) and watched Mr. Clint Eastwood sweat and pant with running along the side of a large black car. He still didn't quite understand why a man perhaps older than both Greg and himself combined would put himself through such torture, but spoke nothing of it. Justin was confident that Greg would answer all of his questions at the end of the movie; same as he always did.


End file.
